Break a Leg

1. If you bring an air mattress to the airport, you might as well throw it on the plane.
For some reason, it was decided right before take off that we probably wouldn’t need it.  Gino’s (Director at FYI) hardwood flooring proved otherwise.  Which brings me to my next lesson...

2. Apparently “personal space” is something Dashiell, Yuri and I do not possess.
This is something we learned when having to share one couch for the first 3 nights staying in Brooklyn.  Let’s just say, at least we were warm...  

3. Be careful, because you might just end up getting married in a cab.
So upon entering a cab the 3 of us being myself, Yuri and Dashiell are handed 3 scarves to wear.  Being polite, and still slightly inebriated from the nights festivities, we put them on with out question.  We’re then told by the cab driver that we are united or “married” as brothers.
Heh, when in New York.

4. New Yorkers aren’t fans of imitations.
For some reason, they don’t like it when you sit in a café at 3 am jokingly telling each other, “Go @#$% yourself” in stereotypical New York accents.  Or maybe they were Boston accents.  Who knows?

5. “Ewoks: The Caravan of Courage” might possibly be the best movie ever!
From its amazing costume designs to it stellar acting performances, “The Caravan of Courage” is yet another testament to George Lucas’s masterful storytelling.
And perhaps the best example of the amazing acting portrayed in this movie can be seen
here at the time of 06:53.
“IT MUST BE A MONSTER OR SOMETHING REAL BIG!”
Never has such a performance been delivered with such monotonial (look it up) tenacity.

6. Never challenge the bartender to a Sake Bomb contest.
You will lose.

7. Make sure to bring your resident host to every tourist attraction you see.
They might say they hate every second of it, but you can tell deep down they have always wanted to walk in the icy wind across a bridge that they drive across every day.

8. Carry an up to date driver’s license when departing a New York airport.
So while my driver’s license says it expired in 2006, I do have papers saying that it is current.  (long boring DMV story I will not get into)
And while the San Francisco airport had no trouble with this minor paper infraction, the New York airport was a completely different deal.
Upon showing airport security my license, a conversation almost identical to this ensued.
“Go to that back wall sir.”
“Uhmm where?”
“That wall at the end.”
“And..... do what?”
“Just go to the back wall sir.”
So I walk to the back wall at the end all the while newspaper images fly into my head reading “Chase Cougar: Terrorist?!”  At this point Dashiell and Yuri who have made it through security decide it’s best to heckle me as I make my long walk of shame past hundreds of people to the dreaded back wall.
Once at the wall, I realized it was just another security waypoint, but with the difference being I had to wait in a plexiglass security cubicle while a very bored and heavyset woman waved a “magic wand” around my carry-on bag.

-Justin

Coming soon: A fantastic and sentimental slideshow of our trip!