Sometimes, sometimes you just have to know when to call it in.
Maybe it was the article I wrote myself that caused us to realize that we're not making any money, maybe it was the comments from two or three people from my Gawker article who said, "MAYBE IF THIS WAS FUNNY YOU'D GET PAID" or maybe it was Kent Nichols, creator of Ask a Ninja, who posted a graph on the NewTeeVee site comparing the numbers for the Break a Leg site to his apparently popular (who knew?) Ask a Ninja site -- proving once and for all that that we're not in the same category (we, for one, have hardly ANY ninjas).
Whatever it was that caused it, we yield, we fold, we lay down our swords and we announce today that there will be no future episodes of Break a Leg, there will be no conclusion, there will be no ending, there will just be this blog post and an upcoming Mint song thanking you all for voting for us in that Yahoo contest.
You know. The one that we lost...
...to a girl.
Do not shed a tear for us just yet, though. I mean really, who knows? Maybe a year from now, maybe two years from now, maybe even three, when Ask a Ninja is not only a movie and a TV show, but a brand of cereal, Break a Leg will make its triumphant return. If we're lucky, NewTeeVee will write a blurb about it, if we're not lucky, Joe of Joe's Blog may say that it's an okay show but it's seriously lacking ninjas -- however it'll happen, maybe April 1st, 2009, we'll return for one special holiday episode just to shoot David in the head for you.
There is good news, however. We're going to be fully dedicating ourselves to creating a scripted video blog. Now, hear me out. I know you're going to say, "It's been done" or "It's derivative" or, "Seriously?" But, the idea, we think, is solid gold. It's a video blog about people making a video blog.
Let the emails from the venture capitalists flow forth like a river of gold.
The series will be called "Web Cammin' Womens" and it'll star our very own Alexis Boozer (Amber Turnipseed) who will be playing the star of her own vlog. Daniela DiIorio will play the director who hired Alexis to film her vlog. They will make out. And they will wear bikinis. And yes, sometimes, there will be ninjas.
Roommates, eat your heart out.
So, don't weep for us, don't mourn us, don't even hold mock funerals for Break a Leg. Instead, tell your friends of us, tell them -- there was this show that hoped and dared and then they were crushed by all the "gays" and "wtfs" that rained down on them like lightning bolts from a very angry, YouTube-watching God. Tell them there was once a web show that hoped and dreamed to be a real show, and when it failed the creators went on to bigger and better things, like porn and, in my particular case, juggling.
Oh, and while you're at it, tell them Happy April Fools Day.
Have a good April!
-Yuri and the Break a Leg Team, who's absolutely releasing another episode.